Dore ibintu abakundana bakwiye kubahiriza kugira ngo bubake umubano mwiza

Buri muntu wese akenera urukundo kugira ngo abashe kuryoherwa n’ubuzima

Hari ibintu byinshi bikunda kuba imbarutso yo guhagarika umubano hagati
y’abakundanaga. Birashoboka ko waba warigeze wibaza impamvu umubano wawe utaramba kandi ibyo bikaba kuri buri muntu mukundanye.
Ntagushidikanya hari ibyo utigeze ugerageza gukora neza.

Kandi ikosa rito ushobora gukora rishobora kwica umubano hagati yawe n’umukunzi wawe.

Bamwe mubakundanye bahagarika gukomeza kugirana umubano gusa wagenzura ugasanga ku mpande zombi baracyakundana ariko kuko buri umwe yarambiwe gukomeretswa n’imigirire cyangwa se imyitwarire y’undi ukabona bombi bahisemo guhagarika umubano.

Urubuga Elcrema.com, rugaragaza ibintu bitanu bigomba kuba mu rukundo
bitaba ibyo rugahagarara.

Kwakirana

Mbere yo kumva umukunzi wawe yakwakira uko uri, nawe banza wakire uko ari.
Umukunzi wawe uko ari ahanini bishingira ku myitwarire ifitanye isano na kamere ye idapfa. Kubemeramana bavuga ko nyuma yo gukizwa cyangwa kuva mu byaha ngo kamere itagenda ahubwo ngo igengwa nanyirayo akayicubya kugirango itamukoresha ibyamugiraho ingaruka cyangwa ibyagira ingaruka ku bandi ariko bitavuze ko kamere ye ngo yapfuye.

Mu buzima kugira ngo abantu babane, no mu bundi buryo busanzwe bisaba kwakira uko bagenzi bawe bateye mu myitwarire yabo nk’uko nawe bihanganira uko uteye mu myitwarire yawe.

Muri kamere abantu dukunze guhuriraho, ni ukumva ko amakosa tugira ari yo year ndetse akwiye no kubabarirwa, ibyo bikagaruka no kukwikunda kwacu ku buryo buri umwe aba yumva akwiye kugirirwa neza, kugirirwa impuhwe cyangwa se kwitabwaho kurusha abandi.

Ibyo byose bigaruka no mu rukundo nka kimwe mu gice kinini kigira ubuzima bwacu kuva tuvuka kugeza dupfuye.
Mu rukundo rw’abateganya kuzarushinga naho ntibitandukanye cyane n’ubundi
buzima duhura nabwo bwo korohera bagenzi bacu kugirango tubashe kumva ibintu kimwe.

Iyo ukundanye n’umuntu uba ugomba kwiga kugice agiraho intege nke ndetse akenshi ugaha agaciro naho agira imbaraga ukahagira agakingirizo kagukingira guhora uha agaciro ibibi bye cyangwa se intege nke ze. Aho afite intege nke ugomba gukora ibishoboka byose ukaziba icyuho kuko gishobora kuba icyanzu cyizinjidwamo n’agatotsi murukundo rwanyu. Hano ugomba kwiga ukanakira imiterere y’umukunzi wawe kugira ngo umunezero uganze mu rukundo rwanyu.

Ubwumvikane

Abakundanye buri umwe aba agomba kugira ibyo yigomwa kugira ngo umubano wanyu mwembi udahagarara. Ugomba kwemeranya n’umukunzi wawe ku bintu bimwe kabone n’iyo waba utari mu bihe byiza byo kwifatanya nawe muri ibyo.

Aha ariko kwemeranya nawe bizaterwa n’uko ubona ibyo mwemeranyijeho ntacyo byakwangiza cyangwa ngo bigire ingaruka biteza hagati yanyu. Mu gihe ubona ntangaruka, uzihangane ubikore kuko mu rukundo uba ugomba guharanira ko mugenzi wawe agira ibyishimo kabone
n’ubwo wowe waba utanezerewe.

Hano ntago biba byiza ko umukunzi wawe agibwaho ingaruka n’ibyakubabaje atanagizemo uruhare.

Guharanira ubw’umvikane n’umukunzi wawe ni kimwe mubizatuma akubonamo
ubudasa kabone nubwo mwatandukana. Igihe gutandukana kwanyu waba utabigizemo uruhare, ntazabura guhora yibuka ko wamubereye imfura ku buryo azahora akwibuka.

Kuri iyi ngingo, ni byiza gusobanukirwa ko umukunzi wawe atazakora ibintu uko
ubyumva cyangwa ubishaka. Uge uharanira gushyira imbere gahunda ugirana
n’umukunzi wawe mu gihe cya ngombwa kandi gikwiye kuko umukunzi wawe ni
umuntu w’umwihariko kubuzima bwawe kuko aba ari nawe muba mushobora
kuzasangira ubuzima bumwe igihe kinini kurenza abandi.

Urukundo rutagira umupaka

Buri muntu wese akenera urukundo kugira ngo abashe kuryoherwa n’ubuzima.
Urukundo usabwa guha umukunzi wawe, ntirugomba kugira amategeko arugenga.

Ugomba kuruhata umukunzi wawe ntakirogoya kugeza igihe ushyiriyeho urusika
runini mubabasha kuba barwivangamo. Uru rukundo bakunze kwita mu rurimi
rw’icyongereza (unconditional love), bacye barufite usanga barangwa n’umunezero kurenza abatarugira. Umuntu ugira runo rukundo, aba akunda umukunzi we nta gisibya. Buri kimwe cyose yabwirwa kibi kumukunzi we ntigishobora gutuma amwanga.

Abantu bagira uru rukundo, baba bararangije kwitegura kuzakira guhangana na buri kimwe cyatuma bashwana n’abakunzi babo. Baba kandi bumva kugukunda nta mabwiriza cyangwa amahame ngenderwaho kugira ngo bagukunde. Iyo abantu bakunda bigeze aha ubagiriye nabi mu rukundo, biba bisa nka wa mugani ngo baca ngo “iyibyaye ikiboze irakirigata”, Kuko usanga bagira imbabazi utakekaga ko baguha igihe wabakoreye igisa nk’ubuhemu.

Amarangamutima

Urukundo rutarimo kugaragarizanya amarangamutima ku mpande zombi, uru ntiruramba. Burya rushatse rwanahagarara. Muri uru rukundo ni byiza ko abakunzi bombi bagerageza gukomeza gufashanya mu kwishima mu rukundo rwabo.

Ni byiza kugaragariza ibyiyumviro byawe uwo wihebeye kuko iyo bitabayeho mu rukundo rwanyu mumera nk’abari muri gereza aho buri wese aba asa nk’uwibaza icyaha yakoze cyatumye yinjira muri iyo gereza ndetse yewe kandi uba usa nk’utazi n’uwakurenganura kuko ukurura n’uwakurenganije akwinjiza muri iyo gereza ukamubura mu ntekerezo.

Hano, uba muri uru rukundo usa nk’uwasinze ububihe bw’urukundo kugeza aho wumva uhuzwe urukundo, ndetse ukumva ntarukibaho kandi nta n’uwabasha kurugusakazaho ngo bikunde.

Umukunzi wawe uba ugomba kumushimisha no kumwitaho ndetse ukanamutetesha kucyo byagusaba cyose ushoboye.

Kugira umwanya wo kuganira birambuye

Niba ufite umukunzi mukaba mutajya mugira umwanya wo kuganira birambuye, aha byagorana kuvuga ko uru rukundo ruzaramba. Mubiganiro by’imbonankubone niho uzabonera icyo umukunzi wawe agutekerezaho.

Iki gihe nicyo gihe muba mubonye cyo kugaragaza ukuri kwibibarimo kugirango
mwubakane umusingi w’urukundo rwanyu muburyo buciye mu bwumvikane
kugirango mutazashaka kwisama mwarangije gusamara kubera ko mutabasha
kuganira kumurongo mugari mwinjiyemo murukundo.

Kutaganira bizatuma mugonganira mu bintu byinshi bituma mushwana kuko buri umwe hari ibyo ataba asobanukiwe k’uwundi. Ibyo bigomba gusobanuka ku mpande zombi, bizasobanukira mubiganiro mugirana kuko mubiganiro ariho akenshi uba ugomba kwereka umukunzi wawe uwo uri we neza noneho akakumenya birushijeho uko yari akuzi, akamumenya bitandukanye n’uko abandi bakuzi kuko ari nacyo gituma umukunzi wawe yitwa uw’umwihariko ku buzima bwawe.

Izi nama uko ari eshanu, buri umwe uri murukundo abashije kuzigenderaho
akazishyira mu bikorwa, zizamubera inzaratsi y’ukuri kwera. Byagorana kuba
umukunzi wawe yazajya akwitiranya cyangwa agushidikanyaho mugihe waba
wubahirije zino nama.


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